Do you lie awake some nights, wondering how to stop worrying about everything?
It often starts small.
A text that hasn't been answered. A bill on the counter. A strange noise the car made this morning.
Then one worry invites another. Before long, your mind is racing through every "what if" it can find.
If this feels familiar, please know you are not broken. Learning how to stop worrying about everything begins with understanding why your mind worries in the first place.
Why Your Mind Worries So Much
Worry is your mind's way of trying to protect you.
Somewhere deep inside, your subconscious mind believes that if it thinks about a problem long enough, it can keep you safe from it.
That's a loving intention. It just isn't a very restful one.
Worry tends to grow louder when:
You're tired. A weary mind has less room for calm.
Life feels uncertain. Change, health questions or money concerns can keep your mind on alert.
You care deeply. People who love fiercely often worry fiercely, too.
You've carried a lot alone. When you've had to be the strong one, your mind learns to keep watch.
When you see worry as protection, you can thank it, and then gently teach it a calmer way.
How to Stop Worrying About Everything: The Worry Window
This simple practice gives your worries a time and a place, so they don't follow you all day and all night. It takes about fifteen minutes.
Choose your window. Pick one time each day, such as 4:00 in the afternoon. Keep it well before bedtime.
Begin with your breath. Breathe out first, slowly and fully. Then breathe in for a count of 4, and out for a count of 7. Repeat three times.
Write every worry down. Let it all spill onto paper. No editing, no judging.
Sort each one. Ask, "Can I do something about this?" If yes, write one small next step. If no, draw a gentle circle around it.
Release what you can't control. Close your eyes. Picture each circled worry as a leaf resting on a slow stream. Watch it float away, one leaf at a time.
Close the window. Fold the paper and set it aside. Tell yourself, "I've given these my attention. I'm free to rest now."
When a worry pops up later in the day, simply say, "Not now. I'll see you at 4:00."
Remember: the goal isn't to never worry again. The goal is to let worry take its seat, instead of taking the wheel.
Calming Worrying Thoughts About the Future
So much worry lives in tomorrow.
Your mind writes stories about things that haven't happened, and may never happen.
When you notice yourself in the future, try coming back to this moment. Feel your feet on the floor. Name three things you can see. Take one slow breath.
Mindfulness is a wonderful friend here. You can read more in Be Mindful to Enhance Your Quality of Life.
When Worry Keeps You Up at Night
Nighttime worry can feel bigger than daytime worry.
The house is quiet, and there's nothing to distract you.
A few gentle ideas can help:
Keep a notepad by your bed, and jot down any worry that wakes you
Use your ERB breath (exhale first, inhale for 4, exhale for 7) until your body softens
Remind yourself, "I'll handle this tomorrow, at my Worry Window"
Let soft music or a calming recording carry you toward sleep
If fear is at the root of your worry, you may also find comfort in Releasing Fear Now!
Sometimes worry becomes so constant that it's hard to enjoy daily life. The National Institute of Mental Health explains the signs in its guide to generalized anxiety disorder. If worry is affecting your sleep, health or relationships, please reach out to your doctor or a mental health professional.
Questions You Might Be Asking
Why do I worry about everything?
Often, your mind has learned that worrying keeps you prepared and safe. Stress, tiredness and uncertainty can make that habit stronger, but it can be gently retrained.
How do I stop worrying about things I can't control?
Start by sorting your worries into what you can act on and what you can't. Take one small step on the first, and practice releasing the second with your breath and a calming image.
Can hypnosis help with worry?
Many people find that hypnosis helps them relax deeply and speak kindly to the subconscious mind, where worry habits live. It works best as one part of caring for yourself.
A Gentle Reminder
I can thank my worry, and still choose calm.
This moment is the only one I need to live right now.
I don't have to solve everything tonight.
Peace grows a little more each time I breathe.
Your Next Step
If worry and fear have been running the show for a while, your subconscious mind may welcome a little extra support. My Release Fear hypnosis audio and workbook guide you into deep relaxation, with calming suggestions for courage and confidence. Listen in a quiet moment, as often as you like, and let a more peaceful way of thinking take root.
Explore the Release Fear hypnosis audio and workbook
It's your life. YOU write the script.
Marlene Shiple, Ph.D., is a life coach, counselor, sexuality therapist and hypnotherapist with Counselors Associated in Phoenix, Arizona.
Photo by Quinsey Sablan on Unsplash